Oakland, CA - Every year or so Nike decides to release a product so addicting, people are willing to fight and kill over it.

Nike Air Jordan shoes.

Since 1986, Air Jordans have been the catalyst for many muggings and even murders. Looks like the release of the Retro Air Jordan Concord sneakers have brought back the good ole' days.

Finish Line, a massive national retailer of shoes and sports gear, said the release put their employees in danger and decided not to open two of its stores. The crowds were so intense, police had to be called to break them up and send them home.

Meanwhile in reality-ville, most Americans are struggling to earn a decent wage. The idea that a pair of shoes is worth endangering the lives of people seems so idiotic, it has to be true. If you ever want to know why people from other countries mock us. It's not our freedom they laugh at. It's our level of stupidity. Our ability to make the most insignificant accessories and completely worthless individuals our demigods. From shoes to the Kardashians, the terrorist have won.

Ok, so the man who waved his firearm and fired it into the air dispersing the crowd was apprehended. What really grinds our gears is the fact that similar reports are popping up in Michigan and Georgia. These places are hubs for astronomical stupidity. But this really tops the cake.

Violence for shoes. People going to jail for "fresh new kicks."  Websites like InfoSack.com provide coupons to get great deals on. If they just spent a little more time reading and less time fulfilling American stereotypes, they could have their shoes, save a little cash, and have a great future.